All posts tagged: New York Times

Thoughts on chivarly and the recent NYT column ‘I don’t want my preschooler to be a gentleman’

When I entered a restaurant today, an African-American man held the door open for me and his wife. I thanked him, entered ahead of him, and held the door open for him as we went inside. The server led me and another male customer to our tables at the same time, and told us we could choose which table we wanted. “You want to sit there ma’am? Ladies first. Take your pick,” said the other customer. I responded, “Thank you” and sat at a neighboring table. Later, when I left, a burly looking guy in a flannel shirt held both exit doors open with his arms outstretched, so he’d be sure one was open when I decided to exit one of them. I was not receiving special treatment. This is something that happens every day in Mississippi, “the hospitality state,” where many have raised their children to be ladies and gentlemen. To some, who have been born into a modern world where manners, sensitivity and kindness are rapidly being replaced by the behavior one often …